Golfers: Don't Skip Church Service.

By: DJJG 

Father Norton woke up Sunday morning and realizing it was an

exceptionally beautiful and sunny early spring day, decided he

just had to play golf.

 

So... he told the Associate Pastor that he was feeling sick and

persuaded him to say Mass for him that day.

 

As soon as the Associate Pastor left the room, Father Norton

headed out of town to a golf course about forty miles away.

 

This way he knew he wouldn't accidentally meet anyone he knew

from his parish. Setting up on the first tee, he was alone.

After all, it was Sunday morning and everyone else was in

church!

 

At about this time, Saint Peter leaned over to the Lord while

looking down from the heavens and exclaimed, "You're not going

to let him get away with this, are you?"

 

The Lord sighed, and said, "No, I guess not."

 

Just then Father Norton hit the ball and it shot straight

towards the pin, dropping just short of it, rolled up and fell

into the hole.

 

IT WAS A 420 YARD HOLE IN ONE!

 

St. Peter was astonished. He looked at the Lord and asked,

"Why did you let him do that?"

 

The Lord smiled and replied, "Who's he going to tell?"

The Kids That Suffer.

See what happens if you sleep around carelessly? The result is glaringly telling:

It's ALWAYS the kids that suffer!!    Her Name is Debra! 

Bulls & Cows - Laughter!

Laughter the best medicine.........

(Contributed by Linundus ardent follower)

“My wife and I went to the state fair and one of the first exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls. We went up to the first pen and therewas a sign attached that said,   

' THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR'

My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs ... Smiled and said, 'He mated 50 times last year.'  We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said,

''THIS BULL MATED 150 TIMES LAST YEAR'

My wife gave me a healthy jab and said, 'WOW~~That's more than twice a week! .......You could learn a lot from him.'  We walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said,  in capital letters, 

'THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR'

My wife was so excited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs, and said,  'That's once a day   ..You could REALLY learn something from this one.' I looked at her and said, 

'Go over and ask him if it was with the same old cow.'

My condition has been upgraded from critical  to stable and I should eventually make a full recovery.”

And ...

Here is an essay written on INDIAN COW 

by a candidate appearing for his IAS exams.

This was published in the Marathi Daily Newspaper.